Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Mother-Daughter

Oh my I need to start blogging more... Well I like my job and all the people. I cannot wait around forever and at some point I need to let go to let that person fly and find their way. So I wish you all the happiness in the world you deserve it and if it isnt me I hope the next woman treats you good and deserves your heart and kindness. I am finally feeling like I am on a good path since everything has happened. I am living paycheck to paycheck but that is alright because I get my daughter everything she needs. So getting if getting the moon for her means struggling with money I am fine with that. I know we will be on top no matter how much money we have... We took Mother-Daughter pictures on Sunday. Nhi took them and they look great!

Thursday, July 8, 2010

My Oh My.....

My goodness it has been forever since I have blogged... A lot has happened since the last time I have blogged. Adalyn turned six months old on July 6. She had her first 4th of July, she sits on her own, and is learning to crawl. I have a job at Sams Club as a cashier, but I think I already blogged that. I went to the ER the other night and my toe was infected so I had to take the next day off work. I miss what we used to be and am so tired of the arguing we do now. Why cant things work out and we can fix whatever happen and give this another go. I seriously miss living in Kansas. I am thinking of moving back once my mommy is home again, the schools are great and there is great pieces of land I could purchase. I am wanting to buy a couple of acres to start out and payoff then get a loan to build a starter home and build from that. I love the Witten and Davis family they are just too great and I do not know what I would do without their kindness. Jessica is getting married very soon and I still have not written my Maid of Honor speech, oh no.... I am slowly learning the being a single working mother is hard and working part time and trying to make ends meat is difficult. But I love being a mother and cannot wait to start a bigger family. I have been scrapping my little heart away. I bought paint for Adalyn's room last week and I am hoping to start painting this weekend. Nhi is going to take mine and Adalyn's photos next Sunday, it will be our new family, Adalyn's six month, and my individual photos. Oh today it rained so much it was flooding... Here are some photos of what has been going on.

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Long Time....No Blog!

Hello...
   I know I havent been blogging, I am getting bad at this! Well I got a job at Sams Club, as a cashier, I am glad... I had a emotional conversation with one of my favorite people, Aimee! I love you and I know how you feel. I want to say how much I miss my family (adalyn's family) in Kansas and I wish I could have stayed up there. I miss the silly, seriouos, loving, and exciting moments with all of yall there. Now if you could see me I am tearing up.

        Since I am working Adalyn has a babysitter, it is Stacy. I used to work at Primos with her and she has a one year old son of her own. Adalyn is still getting used to me being away, but is doing great with them. It kills me every morning to say BYE to her but I know I am going to work my butt off to give her the world...

        Rachel (Adalyn's Great Aunt on Tarrances mothers side) had her baby today. She had a little girl named Addyson she weighed 5lb 9oz., she was about 3 weeks early. I have seen one photo and she is a cutie. Adalyn and Addyson's names are pretty similiar so some people will be calling them both addy! Oh well I guess.

        I have been scrapbooking! I will post photos this weekend hopefully... I am finishing up Tarrance's Fathers Day gift sometime tomorrow it is freaking cute. I hope he enjoys it. I wish this dvds would download on my computer so he could have a video of her.

         Jessica had her bridal shower last Saturday. I made her a towel cake and it was a hit!!

          I also went to Efren's 19th birthday on June 5 to Cheddar's... We had some fun that night at dinner and after hanging out with friends!

Have a good night!!!

Saturday, May 29, 2010

My Pregnancy Journal

Hi all well I have had a stroke of srapping energy! I started my pregnancy journal finally. Well I am going to show you what I have so far. I wish I would get motivated to do this on my other books!!
This is the first page in the book... I think this page is simple but cute at the same time. I used a photo of my belly when I was about 3 months, August 9, 2009. I used a red vintage paper for the background on the photo and wording...
This is the second page. This page has the three important days that I should always remember. The night we conceived a child, when we found out we were expecting and our scheduled due date. I didnt put the actual date she was born because I want it to wait until the end. I ripped each part and roughed up the paper to look somewhat older.
This is the third page. This is the Doctor page. I have two squares with every date of my doctor visits I was at throughout my pregnancy. I used a pink page and the different parts are white printing paper and then green flower vintage background paper. It has two different flowers in two corners.

This is the fifth page. I didnt put the fourth page up yet because part of the writtings got ripped so I just skipped it... On this page I used a polka dot paper, then striped paper to do the lines. I just picked a good font on the computer and printed out the words and cut it down. I put a flower next to each line, they each have two flowers with a dark silver brad in the middle. Over the letters I traced over with markers, the colors are yellow, peach, blue & pink.
This is the sixth page. Even though we arent together anymore our daughter should still know about how we met and the love we had for one another. I put "When we met" centered on the right hand side. A photo from my senior pictures. At the bottom of the page is a index card telling where we met and it is colored on the outside with Distress Ink by Tim Holtz

This is the seventh page. Like I said we are not together but our daughter will know the love and friendship we have for one another. On this page I used two photos, which is one of my senior pictures on the left and then our first picture we took together as a couple in March of 2009. I placed a heart in the bottom right hand corner with the saying "because I love you" on it. at the bottom of the page  I placed "Always & Forever" above the "In Love"
I hope all you enjoy this... I will post more when I get them finished. I am hoping to have this finished really soon!!

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Busy Day!!

 

June 15 is our first meeting for our new mothers club! We are very excited. We have a surprise in stores for the mothers... We are just going to start off simple with the outings and meetings. We really have high hopes for this club! So far it looks like a small group but we know it will grow.
Today was fun! In the morning Adalyn was super cranky so she took a few naps... Later on she had a play date with Dylin, Heather Rogers son... They were so cute together. They almost gave baby kisses to eachother. Adalyn was kicking him gently and slapping his face gently. Dylin is only 17 days older than Adalyn. They were so darn cute!
Today I got all ready to go apply at jobs. I got a call from New York & Company to come back Saturday for a second interview. So I went and applied at Hooters today. Then I headed downtown and I am 4 miles from the next place and my car dies over 6 times. So I park my car at a meter, I never put change in it, and sit for a bit. Then I drove to Bass Pro Shop to wait on Brittany's mom to come follow me. Well my car was running fine so I decided to attempt to drive home. I made it safely. I have to take my car in somewhere and get a ball park figure on what is wrong and how much it will cost. I just LOVE paying to fix things.

I just love all the time I get to spend with my daughter. I am going to miss being a stay-at-home mom... But this is what I signed on when I stopped fighting for what we wanted. I miss him everyday but I know God does things for a reason. And there is a good reason why we are not together but I have a feeling on what it is. I feel sometimes like I am the only for still trying to make things work or for us to be civil but it is hard when you go it alone. I dont have much family to turn to. I have his family but I feel wrong doing it and he doesnt like it. I am scared that when those papers get turned in and are denied I will be completely clueless as to what to do. I said if I had a kid I would not want to live on assistance and I wanted to give my daughter what I could. It kills me to have to depend on ours but I have got used to it because I have had the pleasure of a man do that for me and take care of us but now I am on my own once more. I thought that struggle was over but it is just beginning. I am so grateful for God blessing me with a healthy daughter, her father, and his family taking me in as one of their own. They never had to do that but I am so thankful for the kindness and open-heartedness they have given me. I will always love and cherish them. I always wished that my family was like that towards me. I wonder why I have been put through so many tests but it has been to make me stronger and it has. I once again today have gotten pushed to the side twice.

Well I seen Letters to Juilet and Dear John movies in the past two days. And I loved them. Dear John reminds me of a new short lived romance I had but is now over. I keep saying "Everything happens for a reason." You get back what you give. I am not sure if I am giving enough. I am a good mother and I have received a wonderful daughter,  I am a good friend and I receive great friends, but I must not give enough romantic love to receive that never ending love story.

Thank God everyday for everything He has given and continues to give to all of us.
Sweet dreams to all...

Sunday, May 23, 2010

Stalker....

Never thought I would say this again but I have a STALKER!! I mean I have not done anything to this person except that I could have something they want and they are ready to let go. Its a little nerve racking to know that someone is this way... All I have to say is to leave me and people I know alone... If you arent getting answers from the other person after you continue to ask then leave it alone it just means that they dont want you to know and that is fine because you are not apart of their life anymore. I am just so livid that I need some boxing gloves and a punching bag!! So that is me venting about the STALKER...


I have missed my daughter even though she has only been gone for the night. My life is so wrapped around her which I love that. She spent the night with her great grandparents Granmama and Papa... They just love having her around. Tarrance wasnt able to make it down because of the money. I hate that money is such a problem with people now a days. I wish we all had money to do whatever we wanted, but in some parts of the world that would be bad..


I am jealous of Aimee and Cora because they went and watched Letters to Juliet last night. They said it was good!! I cant wait to go see it...


I watched Robin Hood last week and it was AMAZING!! I am telling you to do yourself a favor and go see it. I also enjoyed The Back-Up Plan.. I just finished watching The Book of Eli. I would be scared if that ever happen to the country... I have all my faith in God to know that He will take care of us.


Well Heather Rogers and I have been talking about starting up a club for young mothers. We want to call it Marvelous Mothers... We want to be a non-profit club and hopefully work to get sponsored.. I am excited about this because it would be a great club to give advice, suppport, activities, charity work... And a place for fun for both mothers and the kids!!


I think this is all i have right now... So have a blessed day and thank God everyday for everything he does.

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Long and Sad Time....

Well I havent blogged in a while because so much has happened... Well this Monday will be 2 weeks since I moved back to Oklahoma. I moved into my aunts house with my daughter. We moved because Tarrance and I kept arguing. I could not be around that or put our daughter through that. I miss Kansas, it had become my home. I miss Aimee, Shannon, Nana, and all the kids, oh and scrapping with Aimee... When I moved back to Oklahoma I started talking to a long time friend we were seeing where we could be more than friends but now he is back home in South Carolina for the summer. We were talking, texting and hanging out everyday but now I havent heard from him since he left. We have so much in our lives that I am confused about what is going on. When he left we were on the same page about us but now I feel as I got played... I am a little worried that he got back with his ex but if he did it is his loss... Its sad because we have a strong connection... Thursday I got in to a wreck, it was my fault, I rearended a guy on accident. We were on the highway and he got over and I thought he was all the way over but he wasnt. So I went and hit the driver side back bumper. His car just got scratched but my tire fender is bent and i have a dent in front of that. We didnt file a police report I am thankful... Well Adalyn is 4 months now!! She talks so much, she is close to laughing and sitting up on her own... I love that little girl so much!

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Lost....

Hi all I haven’t blogged in a while. Adalyn will be 4 months this Tuesday and she is 15 lb 2 oz, she is too adorable!! I have had a great week here is what has happened:

         • I have met many new friends that are super nice and fun to be around.

         • Today I helped set up for Nicole Calvert’s baby shower. She is having a baby boy, his name is Brody Ray, and is due June 24.

        • I didn’t get to send out my mother’s day cards. I feel so bad.

        • I went to Riverfest in Wichita for the first time. It was an adventure.

        • I feel a huge struggle coming up soon.

        • I got accepted to Heritage College for X-ray Medical Technician. I think I am going to have to post pone that too because so much is happening.

        • I am 10 seconds from moving back to Oklahoma and I know I will miss Kansas because I have become familiar with it almost. I have to do what will be best for Adalyn and me now.

        • I am thinking of applying at Hooters. What a surprise the one place everyone has always told me to work at. I need a job that I will make good money for my family of two.

       • This week I went to the Bombing Memorial in Bricktown it was so pretty. Then we walked around the canal it was a lot of fun.

      • I am hoping to see Iron Man 2 in a week but might drag my friends to see something else.

      • If I move I need to find storage and I hate having to pay that because I don’t have any money. I hate being broke it’s not a good feeling depending on a person to take care of you…

     • I can’t wait till I can go to school without any troubles.

     • When I applied at Heritage I won a free one hour massage! Yay me!

Well that is mainly what has been going on. I love my daughter and I thank GOD every day for all the blessings he has put in my path. All the things GOD does are amazing…



HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY TO ALL…

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

God is Great!!

Hey all well recently with everything happening I have started scrapbooking, FINALLY!! Well first I was going to start on my senior book but it has kind of been everything cause I chose which photos I want to do at that time and it is everywhere. So I have some pages for my senior book, my pregnancy journal book, and Adalyns' life book!! So I am going to post the photos of some of them up tomorrow... Well I am currently looking for a job and not looking forward to getting a job, it means less time with my daughter. I am so blessed with everything God has given to me and the people He has put into my life. Thank you God. His is truly the greatest. And it has taken me sometime to get back in the mode of church but I was young and wanted to spend time sleeping and hang out with friends. But God is my number one and I am grateful for all His blessing like my daughter, family, friends, tarrance, and tarrances family. Tarrance's family has really taken me as one of the own and I thank God for that because it is the family I wish I had growing up. Okay enough sad stuff I am tired and about to go lay down... I have to go to Wal-Mart in the morning to get some nice antique looking paper to print my resume`s on... I really want a receptionist job... Sweet dreams to all.

Saturday, April 17, 2010

Birthday!!

       Today was Nana Betty Davis's birthday. I got to go to luch with her, Aimee, Adalyn, adn Cora! We also went to the scrapbook store in Andover. I have a good day and I have got 4 pages done of scrapping today. I just love scrapping. Right now Adalyn is asleep in Aimee's arms. Colby and his friends caught a big catfish today. So now the boys, minus Tarrance, are setting up a trot line at the same pond they caught the first catfish. Tarrance bought a 2001 truck today and went to Madison, Kansas to see Kirk and Glen. I am very happy for Tarrance buying him a truck. So tonight Adalyn and I will be home alone, fun! I hate being at home by ourselves. Last night Adalyn slept in her crib for the first time she didnt sleep in there all by herself until 3 a.m. then Tarrance watched her until 9 a.m. Well I have been praying and I want to find a church that is right for me and my daughter that preaching the word and gets you involved. I love God, my daughter, and my life. I will hopefully get into these CNA classes to get a job soon and I might have to get a job during the week to get cash to get my feet on the grouond so I can get a place for my daughter and I. Everyone have a wonderful night!

Friday, April 16, 2010

This Week!

        Well this week has been good. I spent 4 days in Oklahoma. I had a blast with my friends Jessica and Efren. Adalyn went to her first movie at a theatre and it was The Last Song, a good movie by the way! I got fitted for my Maid of Honor dress for Jessica's wedding... I cannot wait for her and Kyle to get married they are just the perfect match. Adalyn has been fussy the past couples days because she has been fighting her sleep. She is actually asleep right now in her crib for the first time at night. She is 3 months and 4 days! She is so darn adorable. I have prayed so much this week and I cannot wait for them to be answered whenever that time comes. I love my daughter and my life. I am blessed to have my daughter, GOD, friends and semi-family in my life. I am planning on finding a church for Adalyn and I to start going to. I am going to look online at some churchs here in Wichita, Kansas. And I am going to start looking at some rental houses and apartments. I am going to call the Bethal House Training Institute today and schedule a tour of the school and hopefully start some classes and start my career as a CNA for right now to get my feet on the ground. Sweet dreams! Part of me wants to take Adalyn and have her sleep next to me. But I wont she needs to get used to her bed... Im sad though. Okay sweet dreams.....

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

What a day!!

        Last night was awful and I apologized after everything happened. I love my daughter!! Adalyn and I came down to Oklahoma to stay with my aunt for a few days. Today was great! It felt wonderful to see all of my close friends and to just go out finally and have a good time. I went to the movies with Adalyn and Efren, it was Adalyn's first movie in a theatre. And then dinner with Adalyn, Nhi, and Efren. Adalyn wore her onesie tutu outfit and she looked too cute. She is asleep right now. I am hoping I will receive answers to know what path I should take for my daughter and me. Well I am about to go to sleep... Sweet dreams everyone!

Monday, April 12, 2010

Single Mother....

           My life and my daughter's life will never be the same. I am going to be a single mom and my daughter is going to grow up with her parents being separated. It kills me to know that I have done everything in my power to make it work and I am repeatedly turned down. I am going to give my daughter everything I can to make sure she is super happy. I gained a family when I dated him but now I feel I am going to lose them. I will only be apart of them when I bring Adalyn around. That makes me sad because they were the family that I wish mine were to my mother and me. I am very grateful for everything I have been blessed with even if it was only for a short while. I know in my heart God has bigger plans for Adalyn and I. We will get our fairytale ending. Our love was a fairytale and now my prince charming has grown apart from me. I will always love you not just for our daughter but because I truly love you. I will not stand and wait for him to change his mind twice was enough to try. It is time to put this in the past I will not forget our love. Gosh writing really helps me get all my feelings out and say somethings that I can't say out loud. I am going to write this in my journal that my mother sent me.

Life is a great big canvas, and you should throw all the paint on it you can. ~Danny Kaye

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Just Starting

Well I am just now starting a blog. I want this blog to be about my daughter, my life, and my new found hobby scrapbooking. I have started the past week on my senior book. I am excited to finish. I am the mother of a beautiful little girl. My birthday is coming up April 29. I have been so lucky to come into a great family that is loving and just full of fun! The family I have come into is Adalyn's father, Tarrance Witten. It is the family I have always wanted. Tarrance and I are currently separated. I am praying that we can work everything out. I am a online college student now since I had my daughter. I am thinking of switching my major to Photography. We currently live in Wichita, Kansas. I am loving my life and I am very thankful to have God in my life and everything he has blessed my life with.