Two Years Almost....

I am absolutely speechless because it will be two years May 26-27 since I was in high school. On May 26, 2009 I found out I was expecting my first child and the next day I graduated from high school. I then went on to attend school at OSU in Stillwater. I had fun there but the best part was my pregnancy. I was blessed with a great man at the time, we had some amzing times that we shared together. We welcomed a beautful little girl on Jan 19, 2010 at 6pm. We moved to Kanas together and started our lives as one. Everything was great, we were engaged in March and then in April, one day I was so fulfilled and the next my happy fairytale was gone. I moved back to Oklahoma, transferred schools, and got a job as well as being a single mother. I finally was succeeding on my own again and then my prince decided to come back in my life. At the time I had doubts but he seemed to change. Well November we got engaged once again and in December we got the news we were expecting our second child! Christmas was amazing and busy... January 19 our daughter turned 1! Could hardly believe she was one already! The wedding plans were in full swing, the dress was being made, date set, girls picked, and venue booked. And at the end of the month, BAM, fairytale was gone with the snap of the fingers again. Surprise, Surprise... After that I went through a time that was harder on me then dealing with the incarneration of my mother. I lost the love of my life and I still do not know why completely... And know I am starting to love myself again and starting to think I will find the man that will want me, love me and my kids as much as I do. I used to dream and think and was planning the wedding of my dreams but now I cant stand the site of weddings, wedding shows, wedding/engagement photos because mine was completely destroyed. I know I will never get the full truth or an apology for the way I was treated but I think I am okay with that. In life things are not fair and I have never had a fair hand dealt to me. I have had to work for almost everything in my life and I do not want to have to work to be loved... Currently I am going through a joint custody battle that has turned in to middle school drama with people I will not name or speak poorly on. I once respected some of these people but now I have no clue but I know that I will be seeing them forever because we are a form of "extended" family. I know that I will fight to be the bigger person in all this because its best for my babies. On a better note, I am due July 20, 2011, and I am having a little boy. I am naming him Christian Lee, he is kicking right now! I am 24wks and 6 days tonight. I love to scrapbook, make baby stuff, and have a big addiction to buying baby stuff! I have bought my daughter a new crib and most of everything I will need for my son. I am suppose to be moving with my aunt hopefully this week. I have a part time job on the weekends as a photographer/assistant. But I am going to try and find another part time job on the weekdays. I still attend college full time and I am going to be a RN. My daughter and I are going to start going to church again because it feels like the time is needed to be dedicated to our Lord. I love that I can see the best even in the worst times. God Bless everyone. I want to thank the family and friends that have stood by me and been so kind to give advice and love to us....

Ready for it to be over......

So I can barelly hide the fact that I am stressed and ready for everything to be settled.

My daughter got her ears pierced and went to the zoo. My unborn son is kicking hard enough to feel him on the outside. All the major pieces for my daughter and son have arrived finally. Not sure how I am managing doing all this but I am. I got my daughter her bedding back finally, a new crib, tons of clothes and crafts for me to make her!! For my son bedding, crib & dresser, swing, playpen and clothes and bottles.

A couple of my close friends are throwing me a baby shower in June that I am super excited about. The babys theme is Western! I am growing more and more everyday... I am due July 20. Its pretty crazy cause I have so many friends that we are all due around the same times!

I got a new job that I start tomorrow hopefully. I am a little scared but hoping it all goes well! I am still looking for a car because mine is undriveable and using my aunts is hard because she needs it sometimes as well. On top of all that we are moving next weekend to another house and I am excited but I dont have alot of people to help us and I hate unpacking! I was suppose to visit my mother tomorrow but looks like I wont be able to make it. I sure do miss her and cant wait for her to be home...

I am taking my daughter to the Shriners circus on Sunday with her cousin Khaiden and his mom Bayli! None of us have ever been... I bought tons of crafts to hopefully figure something out to make my daughter and then somethings to use in my rooms. I have to order a new comforter set because mine has a huge slit in it and I am still using it cause its not terrible but the stuffing is starting to come out...

I had a doctor appt Wednesday and it went great! Christian is good his heartbeat was 150bpm and my belly is measuring at a 24!

Well thats all for tonight!!

Where to Start....

Its been a while since I have written. A lot has happen since the last post not sure if I wrote last time but I am a single mother again and struggling to make ends meet. I am 21wks and 6 days pregnant with a little boy. Their father and I split at the end of January and it has been hard to forget about him. I truly love him with all my heart and wish we could have worked whatever happened out. I am naming our son Christian Lee Bieger. Adalyn got her first molar in a couple weeks ago and is a little climber! I have no help with buying anything for our son so I have been scraping together any money to get stuff for him and I had to get Adalyn another crib because her original one is being kept from me. I hate to be going through this but I have to get through it for my kids and it will make me a stronger mother and person in the end. We are supposed to go to court for joint custody which has hit me pretty hard and not sure what to think of it all. I am ready to be over all of this drama with him and his family as well. I feel like the bad person in all of this and I am being treated terribly by some of them. You cannot expect people to shun me just cause you say so and turn our friends against me but I guess it’s happening so whatever. I thought I had people close to me that I could trust but I do not think I do I can only trust in my kids and myself. I hate to say that but it’s all about my kids. I am tired of being stressed, emotionally, and mentally drained. I want to start our lives and not worry about drama and people keeping tabs on me, please let us live our lives and let me enjoy this pregnancy. I am so torn on what to do with this pregnancy when the time comes to deliver my little blessing. I love everyone that has been there for me. Thank you so much.

My little gifts from GOD!

I am so blessed to have a great daughter and a little boy on the way! I have bought him one sleeper and a cowboy sign. Adalyn has gotten about 5 new outfits that I got her. She has been mimicing me for the past week and its adorable. She started saying BUBBA and SISTER, and can almost say TRICIA! She is very smart. I love my life and my kids. I took Adalyn to the park the other day with her cousin Khayden... I cant believe that she is already 13 months and Wednesday I get to hear my little Christian's heartbeat... I bought some flannel material to make a recieving blanket and burp rags with but Walmart was out of the sewing machine I wanted, I guess I will try to make them another time. I am meeting up with the kids' Granny and aunt Rachel at Cheesecake Factory. Have a great night...

OUT OF TOUCH....

Hello all it has been months since I have been blogging... Alot has happened in these months. First my daughters father and I worked things out and got engaged then began planning our wedding. i am recently single again... My sweet Adalyn is almost 13 months old, I cannot believe how fast she is growing. I am expecting a baby boy on July 20. His name will be Christian! I am very blessed to still have the support of my family. Adalyn started walking on her own the week of Christmas and it has been fun but she is always into stuff. Christmas and her birthday she got so many toys that I still have no clue what to do with them all! She is adored by many and I am very blessed that God gave her to us. I cannot imagine my life without her. My bestfriend and her husband are expecting their first child they are about 6 weeks along now. I have three other friends that are exoecting as well, two of them with their second babies and both are getting the opposite as they already have, and my other friend is expecting her first and bless her she is high risk and she is almost 20 yrs old. My friend Stacy is due 2mths before me, Caitlin is due a month before me, and Brittany is due a month after me! I am very blessed to have my family and friends behind me and my kiddos!! I will blog later!

Mother-Daughter

Oh my I need to start blogging more... Well I like my job and all the people. I cannot wait around forever and at some point I need to let go to let that person fly and find their way. So I wish you all the happiness in the world you deserve it and if it isnt me I hope the next woman treats you good and deserves your heart and kindness. I am finally feeling like I am on a good path since everything has happened. I am living paycheck to paycheck but that is alright because I get my daughter everything she needs. So getting if getting the moon for her means struggling with money I am fine with that. I know we will be on top no matter how much money we have... We took Mother-Daughter pictures on Sunday. Nhi took them and they look great!

My Oh My.....

My goodness it has been forever since I have blogged... A lot has happened since the last time I have blogged. Adalyn turned six months old on July 6. She had her first 4th of July, she sits on her own, and is learning to crawl. I have a job at Sams Club as a cashier, but I think I already blogged that. I went to the ER the other night and my toe was infected so I had to take the next day off work. I miss what we used to be and am so tired of the arguing we do now. Why cant things work out and we can fix whatever happen and give this another go. I seriously miss living in Kansas. I am thinking of moving back once my mommy is home again, the schools are great and there is great pieces of land I could purchase. I am wanting to buy a couple of acres to start out and payoff then get a loan to build a starter home and build from that. I love the Witten and Davis family they are just too great and I do not know what I would do without their kindness. Jessica is getting married very soon and I still have not written my Maid of Honor speech, oh no.... I am slowly learning the being a single working mother is hard and working part time and trying to make ends meat is difficult. But I love being a mother and cannot wait to start a bigger family. I have been scrapping my little heart away. I bought paint for Adalyn's room last week and I am hoping to start painting this weekend. Nhi is going to take mine and Adalyn's photos next Sunday, it will be our new family, Adalyn's six month, and my individual photos. Oh today it rained so much it was flooding... Here are some photos of what has been going on.