CANT BELIEVE I HAVE 12 WEEKS OR LESS TILL I MEET MY LITTLE BOY CHIRSTIAN!!! SO IT HAS BEEN JUST ABOUT 3 MONTHS SINCE EVERYTHING CRUMBLED AND I AM OVER IT FOR THE MOST TIME BUT STILL FIND IT DIFFICULT TO FORGIVE, FORGET, AND TRY TO MEND MY HEART BACK TO TOGETHER.
I CANT FORGIVE COMPLETELY CAUSE IT HAPPENED AGAIN AND THIS TIME THE DETAILS WERE ALREADY IN MOTION. DATE WAS SET, VENUE PAID, AND DRESS ORDERED'/BEING MADE... EVERYTHING REMINDS ME OF HIM AT TIMES ESPECIALLY OUR CHILDREN.
TRYING TO FORGET IS DIFFICULT ESPECIALLY WHEN I CONTINUE TO FIND OUT MORE AND MORE STUFF ABOUT WHAT HE IS DOING AND EVERYTHING. I GET THAT YOU ARE YOUNG BUT DONT GIVE A RING AND PROMISE TO BE THERE AND THEN WALK AWAY. IDK FOR SURE WHY YOU DID IT BUT YOU CANT ALWAYS RUN WHEN THINGS GET HEAVY. YOU ARE YOUNG AND HAVE DREAMED OF THOSE TOYS AND DRINKING NOW ITS LEGAL. I GUESS IT DOESNT MATTER THAT WE HAD DREAMS TOGETHER AND A FAMILY... I HATE HEARING OF ALL PPL YOU TEXT NOW, THE NEW OUTDOOR TOYS, OR NEW GADGETS ON A TRUCK THAT YOU HAVE PURCHASED CAUSE YOU DONT HAVE A STAY AT HOME MOTHER/FIANCEE AT YOUR SIDE ANYMORE.
JUST NOW YOU START ASKING HOW I AM OR IF YOU CAN BE MORE INVOLVED. ITS BEEN 3 MONTHS AND JUST NOW YOU ASK. IVE ASKED FOR HELP BUT HAVE BEEN TURNED AWAY AND THATS NOT RIGHT OR FAIR TO OUR SON. I AM GLAD THAT YOU CAN SEE A LITTLE CLEARER BUT THERE IS MORE THAT YOU NEED TO SEE AND I HOPE YOU SEE THAT SOONER THAN LATER. I DO LOVE YOU AND ALWAYS WILL BUT MY HEART WAS RIPPED UP BY YOU WITH NO CONCERN. I KNOW WHAT HAPPEN THE NIGHT OF OR THE NEXT DAY AFTER WE SPLIT AND WHAT HAPPEN WAS VERY WRONG AND DISRESPECTFUL. THINGS LIKE THAT MAKE ME QUESTION IF I WAS TRULY LOVED MY THAT MAN.
I LOVE MY CHILDREN AND THATS WHAT MY LIFE STANDS FOR. MY DAUGHTER IS THE MOST AMAZINGLY BEAUTIFUL SMART 15 MONTH OLD I KNOW. I ENJOY EVERY SECOND WITH HER AND CAN NOT IMAGINE BEING WITHOUT HER, THANK YOU GOD FOR BLESSING ME. MY SON I LOVE ALL THE MOVING AROUND YOU DO IN MY BELLY AND HOW YOU LOVE EVERY KIND OF FOOD! I AM COUNTING THE WEEKS AND DAYS TILL YOU COME.
TODAY I BOOKED MY FAMILY FOR A PHOTO SHOOT AFTER CHRISTIAN JOINS US! I AM SO EXCITED! I GOT SOME MATERIAL TO MAKE ADALYN A LIGHT BLANKET AND GIFTS FOR MY GODDAUGHTER AND JENTRI (CAITLINS LITTLE GIRL)!!
I FOUND OUT YESTERDAY THAT ADALYNS GRAMMY (MY 2ND MOM), WAS GIVING ME HER CRICUT FOR MY BIRTHDAY!! I COULD NOT BELIEVE IT AND I AM SO EXCITED AND BLESSED AND THANKFUL THAT SHE THOUGHT OF ME ENOUGH TO WANT TO PASS IT DOWN TO ME!
WELL ALL IS WELL WITH THE PREGNANCY EXCEPT ALL THE PELVIS PAIN... THE DOCTOR SAID IF I GET CONTRACTIONS WITH THE PAIN TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL. I HAVE A TOUGH DECISION AHEAD OF ME WITH CHRISTIANS NAME AND IF HE SHOULD BE IN THE ROOM AT THE TIME OF THE BIRTH, NOT SO SURE WHAT TO DO.... HELP!!!!!!
MY BIRTHDAY IS IN 2 DAYS CAN HARDLY BELIEVE I WILL BE 20!! HAVE A GREAT DAY!
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